āIām sad that itās endingā
āIām sad that itās endingā
Caitlin Anderson tells her father Reed Anderson about her experience living with multiple sclerosis and her decision to be a part of clinical trial for MS at the ¾«¶«Ó°Ņµ. The trial has just ended and Caitlin reflects on her fears of deteriorating quickly without treatment and her hopes that her participation will help lead to a treatment or cure one day for others with MS.
Transcript
Caitlin Anderson: One of the phrases around MS is āYou donāt get MS until you get MS.ā And so a lot of folks feel like they canāt describe their day or describe how theyāre feeling to someone whoās not living with it because nobody understands and quite often itās an invisible illness.
So after several years living with MS, a friend sent me an email message that said, āHey look, hereās a study about primary progressive. You might be interested.ā
Reed Anderson: Well here we are at ¾«¶«Ó°Ņµ.
Caitlin Anderson: I think we first came at the end of May 2011 and now here we are at the beginning of June 2015. And itās my 13th trip here. Still donāt know if it helped and now we donāt have access to the medicine. And nothing is approved by the FDA.
Reed Anderson: So hope and then disappointment? Or how do you think about that or feel about it?
Caitlin Anderson: The hope is that they continue to find good benefits and that the pharmaceutical company realize that it did help and maybe they could fast track it. Disappointment is that itās ending. I feel like this has become another family. My biggest fear, Dad, is that this four years did something and has slowed my progressionā¦
Reed Anderson: Right.
Caitlin Anderson: ā¦and has helped, so Iām afraid that as soon as I stop the medicine, Iām afraid that Iām gonna go on a big downhill slide. Thatās really scary.
Reed Anderson: Do you think about regrets?
Caitlin Anderson: No. Never. If I didnāt do this, if my buddies didnāt do this, and the friends that you meet in the hallway didnāt do this, there wonāt be anything for the future. It has to go through that process.
Iāll start looking for other studies that I might be eligible for. I want to make a contribution.
Additional Resources
Produced by Dan Collison with interviews recorded by StoryCorps, a national nonprofit whose mission is to provide Americans of all backgrounds and beliefs with the opportunity to record, share, and preserve the stories of our lives.
Contact: storycorps@nih.gov
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